"Just a small change" turns out to be a full redesign.The logo becomes a rebrand, the rebrand becomes an identity crisis. Mine, not the client's."We'll pay you in exposure." Funny — my landlord doesn't accept exposure.$70 for 500 words. Plus "a couple small edits" that turned out to be forty."Just a few more tweaks" — the longest sentence in the English language."Need it by tomorrow!" Tomorrow has been going on for three weeks.Brief: "make it beautiful." Very helpful, thanks."My boss hasn't officially signed off yet" — sent after everything was delivered."Payment after results." Result: I watch you disappear.Slack at 11 PM on Thursday: "you around?" Unfortunately, yes.Five stars and a comment of "could be better." Working on my self-esteem.Submitted 15 versions instead of 5, for half the budget. Feedback: "lacks collaboration.""It'll take five minutes" — from someone who won't be doing those five minutes."We're a startup." Translation: no money, but plenty of vision."Send the source files" — and then the contact vanishes forever.A 40-minute call to discuss a $30 project."We want something like Apple." Budget: enough for a coffee.Three-minute voice notes to revise a PDF that could've been commented directly."URGENT!!!" at 9 AM. Client's reply: the following Tuesday."We're choosing between you and my nephew who's learning on YouTube."Deadline: yesterday. Brief: coming soon. Payment: someday."You're the designer, you know best" — until you do it, then suddenly they know best.Final filename: final_FINAL_v7_definitive_EDITS2.psd."I'll pay next week." That week started last quarter.Spent connects, did the test — no response. Classic."We loved it, but let's redo everything differently." Same budget."Just a small change" turns out to be a full redesign.The logo becomes a rebrand, the rebrand becomes an identity crisis. Mine, not the client's."We'll pay you in exposure." Funny — my landlord doesn't accept exposure.$70 for 500 words. Plus "a couple small edits" that turned out to be forty."Just a few more tweaks" — the longest sentence in the English language."Need it by tomorrow!" Tomorrow has been going on for three weeks.Brief: "make it beautiful." Very helpful, thanks."My boss hasn't officially signed off yet" — sent after everything was delivered."Payment after results." Result: I watch you disappear.Slack at 11 PM on Thursday: "you around?" Unfortunately, yes.Five stars and a comment of "could be better." Working on my self-esteem.Submitted 15 versions instead of 5, for half the budget. Feedback: "lacks collaboration.""It'll take five minutes" — from someone who won't be doing those five minutes."We're a startup." Translation: no money, but plenty of vision."Send the source files" — and then the contact vanishes forever.A 40-minute call to discuss a $30 project."We want something like Apple." Budget: enough for a coffee.Three-minute voice notes to revise a PDF that could've been commented directly."URGENT!!!" at 9 AM. Client's reply: the following Tuesday."We're choosing between you and my nephew who's learning on YouTube."Deadline: yesterday. Brief: coming soon. Payment: someday."You're the designer, you know best" — until you do it, then suddenly they know best.Final filename: final_FINAL_v7_definitive_EDITS2.psd."I'll pay next week." That week started last quarter.Spent connects, did the test — no response. Classic."We loved it, but let's redo everything differently." Same budget.